As I mentioned in my previous post,
earlier this month I attended a fabulous one day workshop called Making Things Happen.
Making Things Happen is the brainchild of the even more fabulous Lara Casey and is
intended to help people release the fears that are holding them back and live a
more focused and fulfilled life. Emily Ley and Gina Zeidler more than
rounded out the team as the three ladies led our small class through a day of
exercises and honest sharing.
I don’t want to say that it was life changing because that
sounds so cliché, but in some ways it did alter parts of my life for the better.
I feel more focused on a day to day basis by putting into practice some of the
tools that Lara implemented in her life like downloading
and setting myself up for success by preparing for things in advance. I’m more aware of what I want more of in my life and
what I want less of and how I can take steps to make that a reality. I have
gained a whole group of friends who encourage me pretty much daily. I know that
sounds strange as I only spent a day with them, but there is something to be
said about the connection that happens between people when they are being
totally honest and revealing. When you skip all the surface pleasantries and
get straight to the heart, it’s very easy to feel close to someone you’ve just
met.
I’m not going to give away all of the exercises of the day
though. What I will do is share a few of the things that I walked out of that
room with.
1.
It is very powerful to name your fears and even
more powerful to do so in the presence of another. For so long, I thought that
I would be too overwhelmed by even thinking of my fears so I distracted myself
as best as I could thinking that they would go away. What I didn’t realize
until now is that to keep them silent is to allow them to grow and get strong
and “to name your fears is to destroy them”
(thanks Lara!). I was giving my fears
too much credit by tip toeing around them instead of shining a bright spotlight
on them so that I could see them for what they really were. And if I was so
afraid to even name my fears to myself, I was even more afraid (and ashamed) to
name them in front of other people, especially people that I just met. But
something totally different and unexpected happened. Instead of feeling judged
and embarrassed, naming my fears in front of my workshop mates felt freeing and
I felt so held and accepted. I felt like I was no longer alone and I wasn’t the
only one struggling with certain issues. It has encouraged me to share my fears
more often.
2.
The second thing I learned is that it’s ok to
have wants and dreams and it’s important to know myself and know what I like
and how I want my life to look and feel. I have all of those answers within me.
For so long, I felt guilty for wanting anything. So guilty that I had convinced
myself that I didn’t want anything. I now know that it’s ok to want things or
experiences for my life and it pays to get very clear about those things and
then take steps to make them happen. Just doing those exercises with the group
that focused on what we wanted in life, for our day, etc. made me realize that
I know way more about myself and my wants than I give myself credit for. If I just
get still and get honest, all of the answers are there.
3.
And finally, I need to ignore the lie that says
that I shouldn’t step out on faith and try new things because I’m not “good
enough” or “special enough” or “won’t fit in.” Those lies are what almost
stopped me from signing up to begin with. Well, they actually did stop me once.
I had been stalking Lara’s blog for a while when Making Things Happen 2011 was
announced and I didn’t feel like I was important enough or knew enough about
myself to take advantage of it. So I missed the deadline and missed out on that
opportunity. I was telling myself that I didn’t have a business, I didn’t know
exactly what I wanted yet, I wasn’t cool enough and I wouldn’t belong. When
2012 rolled around, and I saw that the workshop was coming to Boston, I took
that as a sign as I live a few towns over. I did my best to ignore the thoughts
that plagued me the first time, took the leap and signed up. In the months
leading up to the workshop, I still felt like I was going to be out of place
and I wondered if I had made a mistake. To my delight, the opposite happened. When
I got there, I more than fit in, I belonged and it proved to me that my
thoughts are not the gospel truth. They are just thoughts and I don’t have to
let them stop me from taking leaps that can change my life for the better.
I totally recommend Making Things Happen to anyone who is
interested and is looking to push past fears and get a kick start on their life.
To get a taste of Lara’s style and thus the style of the workshop, I suggest
reading this blog post that started the whole thing.
Please note that this workshop is not a magic transformation portal where you
walk in a sad, scared person and come out on the other side a superhero. There
is work involved, but it’s clear and simple (not easy) work and it is more than
worth it!